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Post by eye on Aug 3, 2007 14:27:23 GMT
Jacky's story
"Part 1.
Reading these messages brings back so many memories of when I had my first pair of glasses. Unlike some who had posted, I always got on ok with the eyechart at the school clinic and never had any problems reading the line that I was instructed to. I was about 12 when i began to get headaches when reading, and watching the tv, and did not think that much off it. But my mother noticed that i spent less and less time reading, while before I spend half my day head buried in a book, reading for me was a joy.In the end i had to admit to her, that reading was making my eyes sore. Quite firm in the knowledge that my eyes were ok, after all, i read the bottom line at the school check up. I did not get over worried when my mother said she would make an appointment for me at the opticians to get my eyes checked out. Great I thought, half day off school, and no worries about glasses, i can see fine.I had a friend at school who was given glasses a year or so ago, and several times i have tried hers on, and could not see much at all. I used to tell her how sorry I was that she need glasses, if it was me, I would be very upset. She replied how lucky that I was, she would soon be needing to wear hers all the time, instead of just in classes. I can remember telling her the next day at school, that i was going to have my eyes tested by an optician, and asked her lots of questions, about what happens, and what is it like. She done her best to answer me, but again, I was not worried, after all, I could see the board fine, no problems for this girl.
I did not intend for this to be so long, so will post this now, and continue the story later, or tomorrow when i have some time.
Part 2.
The time for my eye test had arrived, and as predicted, I was getting a half day out of school. My mother was going to pick me up lunchtime and accompany me. It was a bit of a laugh for me, as I said, there is no way I need glasses, and I could read the board at school with no problems. On arriving at the opticians, they sat me down and done various tests before I was asked to accompany the optician into her room. As I recall she was a very pleasant lady, who put me at east as soon as she began speaking to me. I was directed to sit in the chair, and she put these funny frames on me, and blanked on eye out. I was asked to read the letters on the board with various different lenses she kept putting in. When this was complete, she done the same with the other eye. When it was completed, she said, ok, that’s fine, let’s go and talk with your Mother and discuss the results. We sat down at a table in the shop, and I got a funny feeling all was not as it should be, and I was right. She explained to my mother, that I was quite long sighted, and this was causing the strain and headaches. She went on to say she would guess that I had been long sighted for some time, but as I got older and increased the amount of work they were having to cope with, the accommodation was not sufficient to jump between close work and distance, thus putting a strain on my eyes, which was causing the headaches, and problems reading.. She also informed my mother that this is a problem that would not have been picked up at a routine school eyesight exam. As you can guess, at this stage, I was gob smacked to say the least. I can’t need glasses, I was thinking, I can see fine. My Mother then asked if their was a solution for the problem, which she said, oh yes, Jacky will have to start wearing glasses. I felt sick at this stage, this cannot be happening to me, I was imagining having to put a pair of glasses on my face every time I wanted to read or watch the TV.
But it got worse when my mother said I take it she will only require them for close work, and I heard the optician say oh no, she will defiantly need to wear them full time, you daughter is really quite long sighted, and I am surprised she has not had problems before, the prescription I am giving her is quite strong for a first time wearer, and it will no doubt need to be made stronger when her eyes have learnt to accommodate with the glasses. By this time, I cannot describe how awful I felt, my world was upside down. Will post last part tomorrow, explaining the awful time I had to walk into school wearing glasses.
Part 3.
When I had calmed down a bit, the optician suggested that my Mother and I went to have a look at some frames, and then she could get the glasses made up for me.
My mind was still in a complete mess, I did not want to have to wear glasses, and why did this have to happen to me. My Mother asked the optician, if I wore them now, would it mean I would always have to wear them. She replied that as I grew older, there was a chance I may need them less, but could not guarantee this. After a while, I reasoned that if I only wore them for reading, and they helped my headaches, then it may not be so bad, but I was not going to wear them full time. We picked out some frames, after going through most of the shops selection, and I choose a small oval frame in dark brown, I did not admit it, but they quite suited me when I looked at myself in the mirror. The dark brown seem to go with my hair, which while not quite blonde, was very fair. We were then told that we could pick them up tomorrow anytime after midday. There was no way I was getting more time off school, she informed the lady that we would come in after school had finished. I went home with my mind still in a whirl; Mum did not make me go back to school that day, I think she knew that I was upset. She tried to tell me, that they would look good on me, and to think that I could get back to my reading, without any headaches, surely that would be better for me. I asked her if I could just wear them at home, and promised to put them on at school if my eyes ached. She just replied we would see how things went. The next day in school, I confided in my friend and told her what happened. She could not believe that I would have to wear glasses full time; she had had hers for over a year, and still only wore them for school work. I told her I only intended to wear mine when I really had to, then not at school if I could help it. At the end of school, My Mother was waiting outside to pick me up, and off we went to the opticians. After a short wait, the lady bought out a tray with my new glasses sitting in it. They looked different with the lenses in. The lady took them out of the tray, and put them on my face, took them off, made some adjustments and put them on again. She then told me to walk around the room and look at objects distant and close, to see how they were.
Being honest, things looked ok, very clear, but the far distance seemed a small bit blurry. She explained that was normal and my eyes would adjust to them after a few weeks of wearing them. My mother seemed happy at this, and asked the lady to confirm that I was to wear them full time. To which she replied, oh yes, she will need them more than ever when her eyes adjust to them. I was then asked what colour case I wanted for my new glasses, and choose a blue case, and took the glasses off to put in the case. This was the first time I realised what full time meant, the assistant said, oh no Jacky, you should really keep them on to accustom your eyes, and my mother god bless her, agreed with her
And there I was walking out of the shop wearing glasses. It was very difficult to take in, I was so conscious of these on my face, it just did not feel right. I had a good look around me, and yes, things were very clear, but a bit blurry in the very far distance, which I was told to expect. I can remember removing them to compare what it was like without, when my Mother screamed at me, put your glasses on, and leave them on. This did not bode well for the future. We arrived home without me meeting anyone that I knew, which was a big bonus was for me. The first thing I did was go into my room and have a good look in the mirror, to see how they looked. Again, being honest, they did kind of suit me; I thought maybe it will not be so bad wearing them for some tasks. One thing I noticed when looking in the mirror, which I had not noticed when I put them on in the shop and looked at myself, was that my eyes looked quite large behind the lenses, I was not sure if I liked this or not, my eyes were quite big to begin with, and to me, I was sure everyone would remark on how they looked. When I went downstairs to speak to my Mum, I asked if I could take them off now promised to use them for reading and watching the tv, and any other tasks that made my eyes ache. Alas, the answer was no, she told me in no uncertain terms that the optician said it was important that I wore them full time, otherwise my eyes would not learn to accept the the lenses, and be able to focus as the should do. So for the rest of the day, I had to keep them on, watching the TV was quite good, I could read the clock in the video recorder without squinting. I went to bed and read my book for a while, and they were a big help. My Mother came in and spoke with me before tucking me in for the night and asked how I was finding them, she explained she just wanted the best for me, and if I had to wear glasses for a while, so be it, and maybe when I am older, I may not need to wear them at all. My main concern was the next day, going to school. I was working out that I could put them on to leave the house, and take them off when I got closer to school and out of my Mothers site. I could not think of any tasks at school, that would require me wearing them. I can remember feeling quite clever with my way of thinking, and telling myself, I had got it all worked out.
Sorry that should have been part 4, this is ending up longer than i thought. But when i sit down to write more memories keep coming back.
For those of you who asked what my first rx was, i still have the card here in front of me, in fact i still have my first pair of glasses. The card reads R+3.00 L+2.75. When i first got my glasses, that number did not mean a thing to me, but as i grew up and became more of and OO girl, i learned the difference between plus and minus. I will mention the changes as is carry on with my history.
I woke up next morning and turned over to check the time by the bedside clock, and saw this blue case sitting there with my glasses inside it. All of a sudden it was not such a good morning. I got up and got washed and dressed, and when I was all ready, took out my glasses and put them on, looking in the mirror again to see how they looked. After putting them on and off for several times, thought I better leave them on until I get near school to keep my Mother happy. When I appeared downstairs wearing my glasses, she took one look, and said, I am so glad you have seen sense and put them on, I thought I was going to have a battle on my hands with you over wearing them. Not at all I replied, I know you are only thinking of what’s best for me. (Even at nearly 12 I was a devious bitch) They still felt funny sitting on my face, I just wanted to remove them. My mother saw me to the door, and gave me a kiss before leaving, and said now don’t forget, you must wear your glasses. Yes I know I replied, thinking to myself, a lot she knows. I had about a ten minute walk to school and as soon as I was around the corner, off came the glasses, and away they went into the case, the case being put into my school bag, where I intended it to stay. In the playground, I met up with Linda my friend, she wears glasses to see the board but not otherwise. Come on then Jacky, lets see your glasses were her first words, and why have you not got them on, I thought you are going to have to wear them all the time.
I am supposed to Linda, but am not going to , I can see the board ok unlike you, so I will only use mine at home when I read or watch TV. She wanted to try them on, so I took out the case and gave them to her. She stood there, looked at them, and slipped them onto her face, saying god, you must be blind, I cannot see anything but a blur, and they must be stronger than mine. I replied well, I cannot see anything with yours on, we must have different types of glasses. (Those days before I was an OO I knew nothing of plus and minus lenses as I do now, to me , glasses were glasses,
The morning lessons went fine, I had a little chuckle to myself when during the maths lesson, Linda had to put her glasses on to copy from the board, I even felt a bit sorry for her. Just before the lunch break, the school secretary came in and said the headmistress wanted to speak to me for a moment when the lesson was finished.
My form teacher asked what I had been up to, and I said nothing as far as I know, but was feeling slightly worried. Lunchtime arrive, I asked Linda to wait for me, and popped down to see the Headmistress. Knocking on her door, she told me to come in and sit down. She explained that my Mother had been on the phone to the secretary explaining that I now had to wear glasses, and it was important that I wore them. She has requested that I inform all the teachers, so they can make sure that you comply.
My carefully thought out scheme had just collapsed like a house of cards
Part 6
I left the heads office in a complete trance, how can my carefully thought out plan all collapse like this, it all seemed so simple when I thought it out. I informed Linda what had happened, and she just laughed, which quite annoyed me. It was ok for her, she only had to put hers on to see the board, whereas I would have to keep mine on, for all and sundry to see and snigger at. We went into afternoon lessons, and I cannot remember what we were doing, but I can remember sitting there at the start of the lesson, waiting to see what was going to happen. Sure enough, the teacher addressed me in front of all the class, and said I have been instructed by the headmistress, to ensure you wear your glasses Jacky, your Mother has informed us you have just got a pair, and the optician told her that to benefit, you need to wear them full time. So put them on please. I felt myself going deep red, as everyone in the class turned and looked at me, this was so unfair. I had no option but to go into my school bag and get them out. I opened the case and took them out, and I am positive everyone in the class was watching me. There was no escape, and the only solution was to put them on, which I did. Various comments came forth from members of the class, like 4 eyes, specky Jacky and some other names, but the teacher soon cut them off and started the lesson. The rest of the period seemed to creep by, and every time I looked around the class, it would seem as if someone was looking at me. To me at the time, it was one of the worst experiences of my life; nothing could be more soul destroying than what I was just made to do. When the bell went for break, I walked out of the class and into the playground with Linda. I then removed my glasses and kept them in my hand. A lot of the other girls in the class wanted to try them on, and I seemed to spend the whole of the break passing them to my friends and explaining why I had to wear them. I can also remember getting some nice comments about how they looked, which I can tell you, helped no end. It gave me a bit of my confidence back. When we returned for the next lesson, it was with a different teacher, but now the class had seen me in glasses; it was not a big deal to put them on again before the lesson began. I was glad I did; when the teacher mentioned he was glad I was complying with orders, and wearing my glasses, and went on to say he was sure it was for my own good. Again, I got a couple of remarks, but on the whole most of the class just turned back to their work. The rest of the day went fine, with no problems. At the final bell, I took my case out of my schoolbag, and removed my glasses to their case. Getting close to home, out came the case again, and on went the glasses. My Mother was waiting for me, and the first thing she said, is I am so pleased you have your glasses on, did you wear them for school. I replied I did and she said she was glad, as she had spoken to the school secretary about me, asking the teachers to ensure that I wore them. I can remember thinking to myself, yes; you got me fair and square there, and spoilt my master plan. But to be fair, later on that evening doing my homework, I had to admit to myself, that it was easier with my glasses on, and it made the work that much clearer, but that was my secret, not one that I was going to admit to anyone
That was my story of my experience at school, but if you think its worth reading, I can carry on, telling how it was when I found out I could not see without them, getting stronger glasses, boyfriends, changes in my eyes, I could go on if you wont find it to boring, for my part I have loved to write the story, it seems like I am reliving my life again by just sharing it all with you. And if it helps any other youngster who suddenly has to wear glasses, then it’s been worth it, even it helps only one
I kind of got into a routine after that, put my glasses on when I got up, have breakfast, and leave for school. Around the corner, off with glasses and into their case. Arrive at school and before going into the first lesson carried out the same procedure in reverse, out of their case and onto my nose. It must have been a few weeks later as far as I can remember, that I noticed that my distant vision was not blurry anymore, but quite clear. I cannot remember why, but can remember that this pleased me, in my mistaken youth; I thought I must mean my eyes are improving because I am wearing my glasses.
Silly girl that I was I was to learn later that it was just my eyes getting accustomed to the glasses. I must have been after about a month or 6 weeks of wearing my glasses that I began to notice a change when I took them off going to school. Things were quite blurry, which was not how it used to be when I took them off. I found this quite concerting, but noticed, after they were off for a while, my eyes would sort of come into focus again, and things would be clearer. By this time, I had gotten used to keeping them on all day at school, even in the playground, it save me getting any hassle for any teachers on duty during the break. It had been my habit to remove them at the end of school, and put them on before getting near my house. There was another school near ours, and I knew one or two of the boys there, and did not want them to see me in glasses. Even at nearly 12, boys were beginning to look a better option than I had always seen them as. Linda and I used to be in competition to see who got the best looking one to chat with. The practice of taking my glasses off and putting them on when it suited me, came to an end, I cannot say at what stage, but it seemed that when I took them off now, my eyes did not come into focus again until I put them on.
At my age, life seemed cruel, but what option did I have, it was getting to the stage that I could not see without them, I had tried doing my homework without wearing them, but it turned out impossible, my eyes felt like they were being dragged out of their sockets, and felt they were crossing (they were not I looked in the mirror) but it felt as if they were. I reckon that within 2 months of having been told I need glasses, I was a full time wearer. Now they went on in the mornings and came off at bed time.
I had tried very hard to not go down that road, but when it happens, there is not much I could do about it. Thing carried on pretty much the same for about 6 months as I recall, and which my Mother concurs, when I began having problems. The headaches were starting, and I could not see as clearly as I once had. An appointment was made for me at the opticians for the following week. I arrived and after a short wait, was taken in the room by the same lady who had seen me the first time I went."
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Post by eye on Aug 3, 2007 14:28:10 GMT
Jacky's story, continued
"I am considering posting furture parts of this in the glasses stories. This was suggested by Julian, and will let you know the outcome when i have spoken to him again. I am only up to when i was 12, and feel i could go on for ages yet, but where i am posting them now, seems the wrong place. If people want to read more, i could go on about when i got to my teens, going through a period of hating my glasses, to becoming an OO girl who loves them. Plus all the other advantages/disadvantages of wearing them. Any comments would be welcome by email or postings. I have already had a few emails, telling me they are enjoying the story, with the exception of one, which was quite rude, so i will not mention it. Lets hear from you all please, are you interested in the rest, or does the story loose interest after getting your glasses at school.
My Mother remained outside, the optician said she would come and discuss what I needed with her on completion of my exam. She sat me in the chair, and asked what problems I have been having. I explained my eyes hurt after reading a lot, and also watching the TV for any length of time. I knew enough by this time not to tell lies, that I was seeing ok and not having problems, even at my age, I was learning fast, that I could not fool my Mother or most other grown ups. It always comes as a surprise to discover you are not as clever as you think you are. She then had a good look at my eyes with an instrument that shone a light into them, after she put the funny glasses on me and put a blank in one eye. A lens was put into the other and I was asked what line I could read. I cannot remember after all this time what it was, but she tried lots of different lens in, each time asking how it was. After the got the required answer, it was much the same procedure for the other eye, which she said was slightly more long sighted than my right eye. But this was nothing to worry about; lots of people had different prescriptions in each eye. When we were finished, it was the same as before, she said lets go and talk to you Mum. We all sat down again, and she said I am afraid Jacky needs stronger glasses, but I expected this, If you remember, I mentioned that she would need them changed after 4 to 6 months. We are getting closer to her full prescription now, so the change I am giving her will make a big difference to her reading and how her eyes will feel in general. Being honest, this did not come as that much of a shock, I knew without a doubt I was going to end up with stronger glasses, I don’t know how, but I just knew. On the plus side, Mum had said I could have some new frames if I needed my glasses changed. I think I was entitled to one free pair a year at that age, and if I certain frames or lenses options, my Mother had to pay part of the cost.
But because I had only had the other for just 6 months, she would have to fork out for the cost of new ones. I was an only child, but my Mother was divorced from my Father, so this must have been an expense she could have done without, but bless her, she let me choose what I wanted. (I did not appreciate all this at the time, but did in later years, and thanked her for what she did) I decided on another small oval frame but in light brown, they seemed to look ok to me and my Mum and the assistant thought they looked nice. They informed me that they would take a day or two to get made up, and they would phone me when they were ready. (None of this one hour service then, but it was not far away). I came home from school one day and was informed my glasses were ready, so we went to collect them. It felt a bit like the first time, when the assistant took them out of the case, unfolded the arms and put them on my nose, took them off, adjusted bits and put them back. I was asked how I could see, and it was ok, and was then given a card to read, which I did with no problems.
Part 10.
I left the shop quite happy in my new glasses, as with my first pair the distance was a small bit blurry, but like the first pair, the optician said this would soon clear. When we got home, I went up to my room and had a good look in the mirror, and decided that they did not look bad, but I was sure they made my eyes look a bit bigger. At this time I did not know much about different strengths in lenses, but the figures in the card that I received was different from the first one. This one was R+3.50 L3.75. I had a few comments at school when I appeared wearing new glasses, but nothing really bad. By this time I was totally resigned to wearing my glasses, and did not even think to take them off. It dawned on me gradually, that if I took them off, I could not see, which was a bit depressing, as I now had to accept that my reliance on wearing them was total. The days were gone when I could take them off as I pleased. I remember feeling a bit sad about this, more so as my friend Linda, still only used hers in class . But I do remember once when she came home with me for tea, we sat and watched a video after, and she complained that she did not have her glasses and found it hard to watch, without sitting right in front of the screen. Putting mine on, made her feel giddy she said, and was worse than watching it with nothing on. School carried on in its usual way, and the rest of the year passed quite quickly. The only notable event I can remember for the rest of the year is when we had the school eye exam, which I passed ok, but a few weeks later, during a lesson, I saw one of the boys in the class, put on a pair of glasses to copy some work from the blackboard. Linda and I approached him in the break, as did several members of the class, asking when he got glasses. He told us after the exam at school, his mum received a letter from the secretary, say they thought he should have his eyes tested. And when he went, was told that he would need to wear glasses. I can remember asking him what he had to wear them for, and he said just to see the board, like Linda does. As you can imagine, I was a bit put out about this, that made 3 of us in the class with glasses, and I was the only one who had to keep mine on. I know now, he was short sighted. Now we had the summer holiday to look forward to, and as I recall it was a hot summer, and I enjoyed it. Towards the end of the holiday, Linda said she had to go for her eye test, and could I go with her and her Mum, to look at some new frames, hers were by now,
Quite battered and bend with all the time she took them on and off and stuffed them in her school bag. I asked my Mum if I could go with her, and she was quite happy at this. We went to a different shop to what I was taken, but the routine was much the same, Linda went in, but her Mum went in with her, I was left sitting out in the waiting room.
To be continued
After what seemed an age to me, but I guess it was only about half and hour, they came back out. Before I cold ask Linda how she got on, she blurted out, that she was going to have to have stronger glasses; she only managed to get so far down the board. It appeared that the optician had told her Mother, she would be better wearing them full time now, and would notice a big difference when she got her new glasses. To me this was great, we would have two full time wearers in the class, and I would not be the only four eyes sat there. She picked out some frames, very similar to mine, but in a blue plastic, they looked nice on her. It was a few days after that we met up again, and the first thing I noticed, she did not have her new glasses on. I asked if she had them yet, and she replied yes, but was only going to still wear them for school and TV, she did not need to keep them on like I did. I asked her what her Mum said, but her Mother must have been more lenient than mine because she informed me her Mum said its up to her when she wears them, she will know when to put them on, and she was not going to make her wear them full time if she did not want to. I remember being a bit put out by this, why my Mum could not have been the same. I cannot remember now what her prescription was, but there did seem a big difference in her new pair, I noticed for the firs time lots of rings in the lenses and I had not seen them before. This was something I could not see in mine, but was to learn later on these were called power rings, and you only got them in minus glasses. Back at school, not a lot changed, I still wore mine full time, and Linda still wore here just for the blackboard. Not much changed for the next 5 or 7 months, and then two things happened.
I realised that Linda was wearing her glasses a lot more, she did not always take them off when the lesson was over, and several times still had them on when we walked home. I can remember asking about this, and was thrilled when she said that it’s getting that she cannot see when they are off. Music to my ears, another girl with glass all the time, maybe it was mean of me, but I was glad, and happy to see her wearing them more. The other thing was not so good, I was having problems with my eyes again, just like before the headaches began, and my eyes felt very tired most of the time. I tried to ignore it for a while, but in the end had to ask my mum to take me back for another eye exam. She fixed this up, and soon I was back at the same shop, same lady, same chair, sitting there having different lenses stuck in front of my eyes. This I thought was getting quite familiar now, but I was not really worried or upset, what was a small upgrade. The only thing I can remember, was my Mother came in the examing room with me, I think she was a bit concerned what the matter was.
After the exam, which was much like before, different lenses until I could read the line that I was supposed to? At the end, she turned to my Mother and said that Jacky had become quite hyperopic, (I had to look that up) and she would need stronger glasses
Part 12.
I can remember feeling, this is becoming a habit, every time I went for an eye test, and I needed stronger glasses. Not what I wanted to hear at all. It got worse when the optician said, Jacky will be better picking a smaller frame this time, it will help with the lenses she needs. I can remember my Mother asking in what way, and she explained that they would be thicker than my old pair, and the smaller the frame, the better they would look. I ended up with as small plastic frame in silver, which I admit did not look bad. Until I collected them, and was not that happy, the lenses seemed to bulge out in the middle, far more than my old pair. And magnified my eyes far more.
I learned from the card that came with them, that I now had a prescription of R+4.50 L+5.00, which seemed a big jump from the first pair I got not that too far in the distant past. Also by this time, I was totally reliant on them, to even try to leave them off was becoming impossible, I needed to keep them on from morning until night, and there was no taking them off just for a short while, like I had tried to do before.
Linda said the looked ok, and it did help that she wore hers most of the time now, it seems we were both resigned to the fact we needed glasses. It was a good thing that I did not know at the time, they were to get a lot stronger yet before my eyes settled down, but that was in the future.
Also the time had arrived when both Linda and I started to take an interest in boys, or more than we had before. I can remember my first real boyfriend, who was quite happy that I wore glasses, and apart from asking a few questions about them, just seemed to accept that I was a wearer. Again as I recall, not a lot happened in the next few years, even my prescription stayed ok, or at least I had not had any problems.
By now, I was 15 years old and at school, we had a couple more members of the class who had appeared in glasses, so it was not just a few of us. I can remember that they all could swap glasses and see to some extent, but no one who tried mine on could see at all. I was beginning to learn the difference between short sight, and long sight. It would have been nice to have someone else like me, that we could have tried each others glasses on. The other think that stands out, is my Mother found out that she was to need glasses, but only for reading, or so she told me. I went with her and helped her pick out some frames, that looked nice on her. It was interesting when she got them and I had a look, because they magnified like mine did, but I could not see much with them on, but it was obvious that her lenses were a lot weaker than mine, you could see by how they magnified far less when I held them out to look at.
It was soon after my 15th birthday, I began to have problems again, but tried to ignore it, as my routine test was due in a few months, so wanted to leave it until then. "
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